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He closed his eyes as the five years passed by in his memories, the years where he lost himself to his life, the life where he was alone, no friends, no family none to call his own, he touched his temple the familiar headache was making reappearance. He opened eyes, then one of the drawers on study table, tore out an aspirin and gulped it down with sip of water. He was alone in the sanatorium today, all his staff was out celebrating Diwali as he sat secluded in his escapade from outer world - world where he was alone and unwanted!

He closed the journal in front of him; and leaned on chair. His staff loved him at least that’s what they preferred to show him but he wasn’t unaware of the grapevines that prevailed. Shanty’s sexual life had been a rich subject for juicy gossips; it’d been five years now since he was unable to get near anyone. He remembered how just after an year in Roha he had allowed himself closer to one of the nurses thinking it’s been a long time, but when she got down on her knees it was an utter embarrassment for both of them. The second time was three months later when one of his interns had tried to entice her to him, it was a fiasco!

Then Shambhu the ward boy tried his tricks on Shanty after he learnt of Shanty’s women encounter failures. Shanty remembered his high school days when he enjoyed his lunch breaks with Karan, his so called best friend, in the men’s loo where Karan would blow Shanty’s mind playing skin flute. He had thought at least Shambhu would be able to get his libido back, but in vain. After Shambhu, Shanty stopped trying; he knew Shweta had taken more than his life, his manhood!

He had immersed himself in his profession, he was known for best publications world-wide, he was just back from world psychiatric symposium in Canada. He was a very successful psychiatrist today, worlds best hospitals were asking him to join in, but he was running away. He felt safe in his hole, his sanatorium, he started five years ago. It was a small place out of city, in the suburbs a small town Roha, where hardly anyone knew him. He had two interns, four nurses and four ward boys to help him. He heard commotion at the gates, reluctantly he got up knowing he was alone to attend, how he wished he wouldn’t have given leave to all of them at the same time!

He walked to the foyer as he saw three-four men almost dragging someone out of car; Shanty reached the car. He saw that the boy was in and had certain blankness in his looks, noticing Shanty, one of the fellows turned to him “Doctorsaab, this fellow was roaming around naked on the streets; abusing everyone. Local people got together and were about to hit him, we rescued him and got him to your place, will you take him?” Shanty recognised them from the local Temple Charity Trust.

Listening to them Shanty noticed that the boy was naked and sat in the car quiet but staring point blank. Shanty turned to fellows “Yes, will you please allow me to talk to him”. They moved aside as he went inside the car and spoke with the fellow who didn’t seem to understand a single word, he was in some trance but came out with him. As he was taking the boy he asked the people if they knew anything like his name or whereabouts, they replied negatively. Shanty took the boy and told those people they may leave, he will call them if need be, they nodded and left.

He got the boy inside office, as they came to light he saw the boy was in his early twenties, he looked completely distraught, his head was filled with dirt; face and body looked shabby, looking at his privates it looked like he might have pissed or may be ejaculated on himself. Shanty now cursed himself for giving leave to his staff and vowed that next time he will keep at least one ward boy and a nurse back.

He locked the door to his office and so to the building, and took the boy to the checking room. He looked for any signs of aggressiveness; boy looked distraught, in some trance. Shanty checked his pulse and heartbeats and carried out drugs test and found the result negative, he wasn’t on ecstasy. Shanty carried out few more primary tests before he took his jacket off to wear an apron before placing the boy in a bath tub. He got hold of shower handle and pointing it at the boy he started the shower. There seem to be garden flowing out - weeds, sticks, dried leaves and mud. When the water running seem to get a bit clear, he turned off the faucet and took the shampoo applying generous amount of shampoo on boys head. Leaving the Shampoo on head he now scrubbed his body with soap. He started the shower again, and poured the water over the boys head.

Shanty could not believe his eyes, the boy was nothing like what had been a minute back, this was the most beautiful boy he had ever seen, long black curly hair all over his face, round black eyes filled with innocence of a toddler, straight pointed nose and sharp chin he looked like a poster boy. He had nice broad shoulder, well shaped chest, flat abdomen and long slim legs, the boy was well endowed. Shanty liked what he was seeing. He turned him around and now scrubbed his back and round bubble butts for dirt when he noticed scars, scratches and bruises, he cautiously spread his butt cheeks and noticed swollen anus. He gently cleaned the area turned him once again and while soaping his privates he noticed bruises on his shaft. The pubes made it difficult to see any form of violation on his balls, but he saw perineum was bruised at several places. He decided to trim his pubes to check if he was violated anymore. He took the trimmer and took off all the pubes slowly without hurting the boy. There was scanty body hair giving him better look of his skin. When the pubes were off and water made his skin cleaner Shanty noticed more than just bruises - scars and scratches. He added some savlon in a water bucket and cleaned his bruises and scratches once again.

Close examination near his chest, back and rest of his body revealed many more bruises and scars; the boy was physically abused, may be more than once. The boy was still in trance staring point blank and seemed to have no effect of trimming or bath. Shanty now wiped him with a large towel careful enough not to hurt him and took him back to his checking room. He noted down his blood pressure, did checkups for more bruises or scars and then finally ended it with some STI and HIV tests. Luckily, all the reports were Nil. He dressed the boy in a fresh patient gown and left him on a bed in the ward. Watched over him for a minute to assure he was in bed, he walked to his room in the farther corner of ward.

Assured that boy was physically violated, he called the local police station and informed the officer. Shanty was used to talking with officers considering number of abuse patients he treated in past. He gave all the relevant details and promised to send a photo of boy in morning when the officers would come for regular interrogation before ending the call. He peeled off his cloths which were a bit wet now considering the shower he gave to the Boy. He sighed as he remembered the beautiful body of the boy and innocence in his eyes!
Shanty turned the faucet as his body soaked in warm water, soothing all his twitched muscles. He felt life was getting back in him as he soaped his body. He turned the faucet off pulled on his towel dried himself and walked out putting on his bath robe. As he came out he heard footsteps near his door, alarmed he opened the door; it was the boy!

His cloths were gone, he was nude again and his eyes were blood red and he looked at Shanty with an unknown rage, he walked past Shanty pushing him in his room. The boy now looked at Shanty and said “Faggot! Come here” Shanty’s brows shot up, Shanty studied the boy now as he had a violent attack. Shanty wanted to see effects, the boy kept on abusing him calling him with dirty names to do dirty things that only the roadside thugs would do or say. Shanty was now leaning on his bed. The boy in a spur jumped near Shanty with new row of abuses asking him to oblige or he will pay for it. Shanty lost his balance and fell on bed.

Now the boy climbed on him and acted as if he was raping Shanty by mocking the to and fro action on his crotch and playing around his chest. He increased his pace as his breath fastened and he climaxed between Shanty and his own body; semen smeared on both as he collapsed on Shanty!

In a jiff after collapsing he went back to his point blank state as his pulse still raced. Shanty quickly moved to check his pulse and blood pressure with the digital equipments in his room. He made notes to later realise he needed to wash the boy and himself. He took the boy to his own shower; he stifled for a minute before he threw his bath robe in the laundry basket.

They were now both naked in the shower as Shanty turned the faucet and let the stream of water wash the thick creamy sticky stuff off the boy’s body, his heart raced fast as he cleaned the groins of boy and his mouth went dry in shower. He pulled his foreskin and washed his glans with warm water as boy kept on staring in blank. He checked his balls and his hands lingered there for some more time.

Ensuring the boy was clean he turned to himself only to notice throbbing boner, he was caught in a hurricane of emotions. Happy to find his manhood back, confused as to what next, embarrassed for getting it while washing his patient, infuriated with self for being unprofessional with patient who was not in senses and on his mercy. Professionalism won, and he washed himself, turned the faucet off and wearing a fresh bath robe he started to clean the boy who seemed indifferent to all this confusion. He dried his hair with affection and guilt slowly turning to body -palpable attraction, guilt, and warmth oozed in his touch.

Shanty was wiping boys back when the boy suddenly turned to look at Shanty, tear rolled off his eyes. Shanty was mesmerised this was first sign of any positive emotion from the boy, Shanty moved forward and hugged the boy, the boy was transfixed and at a standstill again but tears kept on flowing. Shanty was thrilled to see a breakthrough to his treatment and quickly dried them both to take the boy to the bed. As he was thinking the new break way had somehow fired up the lust in him too, he thought if he can use his attraction to cure boy. He had noted that worst sexual experience and lack of love had made the boy what he was now, so he thought love, affection and sex experience filled with love will bring boy back to normal world. Now that his inner lust was coated with medicinal approach, he felt at peace and looked at the boy who was sitting on Shanty’s bed naked, immobile, and transfixed, lust vanished and some not so unknown protective feeling took over, Shanty shuddered!

Shanty, kept his notes in drawer, shut it and moved to the boy. He made the boy lie on his own bed and went to latch the door. Shanty slept next to the boy, engrossed in his thoughts. Years flew by as he saw a very young and naive Shanty, darling of his friends and family. He was laughing his heart out with his pals, they were cracking the most silliest jokes on their pot bellied professor. Slowly, each one bade him bye and it was Shanty, Shweta and Karan the three inseparables. Shweta kissed Shanty on cheek “I better leave you two love birds alone” she winked at Karan; Shanty’s cheek turned darker shade of pink.

Shweta left, Shanty looked up to Karan who was enjoying the blush on Shanty’s face. Shanty and Karan got up and moved towards Shanty’s car. As soon as they were in car, Karan locked his lips with Shanty, Shanty reciprocated back with a strong hug and there kiss became passionate. Karan slowly traced his way down neck and grabbed Shanty’s crouch as Shanty felt an instant hard-on. Karan undid Shanty’s pants without wasting even a minute and started playing the skin flute. Shanty was moaning as Karan who had by now mastered the art of pleasing Shanty slurped and enjoyed taste of Shanty’s love juices.

Shanty moaned his heart out as he emptied his seeds in Karan’s mouth. Shanty was breathing hard as Karan enjoyed the last drops of Shanty’s man juices. Shanty regained his breath, “Karan you are insatiable” Karan licked the last drop off, “If only you knew how great you taste, and how you’ve become my addiction” he licked his lips for any seeds that escaped his mouth. “But it was just an hour back that you sucked me in the library toilet” Shanty faked a complain, he loved his adventures with Karan the best. “Yeah, and I will suck you off again in an hour before I say bye for the day” Karan replied with a wink. Shanty blushed!

Days flew again and Shanty saw his last day of college, Shanty was sad that he had to part ways with his other friends but was glad to know that he, Karan and Shweta were joining same hospital. It was last round of dance and Karan had already sucked Shanty twice in deserted corner of the hotel without anyone noticing them. No one knew about the Karan and Shanty except Shweta who had always saved the suspicion on them by being Shanty’s girlfriend, who she was but before Karan entered his life. Shanty became rock hard thinking of his first and only time with Shweta on back seat of his car. He was filled with guilt the second moment he felt like he was betraying his friend Shweta and so also, Karan. His mind waivered again and he took a deep breath as he saw Shweta, she looked hot in her black evening gown. The swell of her breast looked more than enticing to Shanty!

Shweta felt Shanty’s gaze on her and smiled back. Shanty waved at her next moment she was with him. “You are looking gorgeous tonight” Shanty complimented “Good, beautiful, attractive, hot and now gorgeous, what’s next?” Shweta mischievously listed all the compliments Shanty had given her each that she listed atleast three times since the evening started. Shanty smiled sheepishly and prayed in his mind that such a beautiful girl hope she gets a good guy for her. The prayer escaped him and he felt relaxed to know that though he liked Shweta he was actually praying a good guy for her. The guilt that was killing him now vanished and he started looking for his hot, sexy boyfriend “Did you see Karan?” he asked her.

She showed him the secluded balcony where Karan was standing alone with his champagne flute, she smiled, but before he could say anything she patted him on back and left. Shanty now walked towards the balcony. Karan saw Shanty approach him and his smile broadened “Shanty, look at this moon it is so far from us unreachable, this air always around us but unseen, strange but isn’t love just like this?” Shanty looked puzzled but before he could say or think anything Karan shrugged his shoulders and said “Oh chill dude, let’s go”. Shanty smiled back and kissed him on his cheeks embracing him. Karan hugged back tight. Shanty was noticed that Karan was not his usual since morning in spite of their escapades.

Shanty mounted on pillion seat and gently wrapped his arms around Karan’s waist as Karan throttled the bike; cold breeze caressed them. Shanty rested his head on Karan and planted a small kiss on his beau’s neck snuggling closer to him, eyes closed. Karan stopped the bike and Shanty opened his eyes to realise they had stopped in front of a small but beautiful bungalow in the heart of city, his home. Shanty jumped down “Karan aren’t you coming inside?” Karan smiled an apologetic no. Shanty moved a bit forth and touched his shoulder “Karan is everything ok with you?” Karan didn’t reply but turned the ignition off and walked with Shanty.

Once in room Karan latched the door and took Shanty to his bed, “Shanty, I have a news to share” Shanty caught the hint of pain in his voice and looked up “Shanty, dad wants me to stay with him in San Francisco, I am leaving tomorrow” Shanty looked up for more, he knew there was more to it but Karan was quiet. “Tell me” Shanty touched Karan “Dad, wants me to join his hospital as intern” Shanty was still not getting the reason for pain in Karan’s voice when he heard it, but he remembered one of his conversation with Karan where he had told him how much he hated long distance relationship and how he would never have one. Shanty felt corner of his eyes prick, he turned to look at Karan, “You want to break-up, don’t you?” Karan gave an apologetic look back “We can’t continue, well Shanty I am not sure we can continue its better we call it off” his voice got choked as he spit this all out. Shanty gripped himself as he nodded “Good atleast you decided to break news before leaving. You are free Karan, go” his voice betrayed and he turned to look away as Karan tried to catch his gaze “Shanty, it’s not easy for me either, but I can’t” Karan tried to plea and tell more. Shanty just turned again and smiled back at Karan “Don’t worry, I am fine you can leave” saying this Shanty quickly glided to the washroom he knew Karan was stubborn rather adamant with his so called rules of life and he never bent it nor even for his own good. There was no point taking this conversation forward. Karan lingered for a while and finally made his way out, he knew he had lost Shanty to his own rules, tears ran down his eyes as he popped helmet and throttled his bike away.

Shanty, washed his face, got back to his room, removed his shoes, kept them on shoe rack, rearranged some shoes there, peeled off his cloths put them on hangers rearranged other hangers and checked the wardrobe for anything amiss, changed to shorts, tidied up his bed, rearranged flowers in vase when all was done, he looked around for anything amiss his room was as good as ever, not knowing, what to do next he sat flabbergasted on his bed as reality hit him. Karan was gone, forever!

Days passed again and he saw Shweta in his room, “Shanty, sweetheart why are you doing this to yourself?” he ducked his head in her laps. She ruffled his hair, “He’s gone baby and he won’t come back, you need to move on, for yourself, your parents and for me” Shanty’s breath got stuck in him as Shweta said this and word me. It kept lingering in his mind giving him strength to move on. She was spending every day and most part of night at his place ever since Karan left. She never left his side and most times simply stroked him letting silence talk for them.

He saw days passed by as he picked himself with support of Shweta, it was like they were never separated, and Karan’s painful departure was locked and stowed away in old chest in corner of his heart as Shweta took centre stage. Finally he saw his parents talking with hers regarding their marriage. He grabbed her wrist and took her to the terrace in front of his room while elders were busy. She shone like goddess in the sunlight as he turned to look at her; he felt the guilt kick his gut, he tore his gaze away. “Shweta, you know you are the best thing that has ever happened to me. You have loved me beyond the boundary of realms, and trust me I love you the same or maybe even more that’s why I want you to be happy. Shweta, I have a darker side to my life, the side you’ve witnessed and embraced me with. How I wish I could like to turn back time and change everything and be the good spotless guy I wished for you but I can’t and I don’t feel worthy” he felt her soft thumb and finger pinching his mouth shut “Shanty, you are the perfect guy I want to be with, I know you will never hurt me. I am sure you will keep me happy than I can ever imagine, yes Shanty I am very happy with you” Smile spread across Shanty’s lips pressed in her fingers.

He knew Shweta loved him and her happiness was to be with him, and that was the reason in spite of his guilt he could never leave her, no he couldn’t hurt her anymore. Shanty winced inward and then few more days blurred past him and he was with his wife Shweta in their bedroom, first night of togetherness after marriage. She was his best friend, girl friend and more. It was not there first time but the pull he felt towards her today was more than he ever felt. It felt like his world revolved around her she held all his strings and he could do anything for her happiness. He pressed his lips on her as the passion melted their bodies in one. He felt her rapid hot breath burning desire to get more closer to her his hands traversed the soft contours and moulds of her body as she moaned in ecstasy under spell of his kiss.
Cloths dissolved under the spell of love and Shanty was mesmerised with the velvety softness of Shweta’s skin rubbing gently on his manly yet soft skin. He was enjoying exploring all the erogenous zones of Shweta as she moaned in happiness. He moulded the soft mounds of her breast slowly nibbling the pink tits. Shweta was quivering with all this pleasure as she struggled to grab handful of Shanty’s hair and pull him up to her mouth, she slowly licked his lips parting them as surprised moan escaped him. Her tongue further assaulted his mouth and discovered his mouth; her hands caressed Shanty’s back and shoulder blade.

Her hands were tracing his spinal cord when they slowly reached his ass cheeks which she started kneading slowly as Shanty slowly surrendered himself in Shweta’s embrace. Her hand now started tracing the mounds of his chest playing slowly tracing her way down to his love pole. Shanty shuddered in her kiss as her soft hands held his warm, silky rock hardness her slender fingers tracing all the throbbing veins on his love handle, his foreskin was slowly pulled back as she traced his mushroom head with softness of her palm.

Slowly she left Shanty’s lips with a slight peck and glided swiftly to satiate now demanding member. Shanty hissed loudly as her lips traced his mushroom head in a circular motion to reach his piss slit licking the blob of precum, she swiftly engulfed him. Her head bobbed up and down as Shanty moaned in pleasure. He felt climax nearing so he swiftly got Shweta back to face him; eyes met, both hazed with the love potions.

Shanty had his lips fervently over Shweta’s he dug in deeper and traversed every ounce of her mouth as his hands held her firmly by her waist and back and other gently traced the curves and contours of her shoulder, neck, bosom, midriff, slowly making way for his ultimate goal he slowly spread her legs tracing her inner thighs, he swiftly moved from her mouth to reach between her thighs he softly kissed her inner thighs as he firmly held her by her waist and slowly slid his lips to dive in for love nectar. The pink colour and soft velvetiness drove him wild as burrowed in deeper with sloshing sound and her soft moans which were turning in to groans. No sooner she was groaning aloud as her love cavity filled with sweet nectar, which Shanty drank merrily. Shweta pulled Shanty up to her from between his legs as his hardness pressed slowly on her very sloppy wet cavity – both hissed with anticipation. Shanty gripped her as she positioned herself better underneath his warm embrace. Shanty swiftly moved close to her as his love handle got engulfed in her love cavity both tightened the embrace as the feeling settled in. Slowly Shanty made to and fro motion kissing Shweta over neck cape and lips.

Both bodies were slick with sweat when Shanty’s body went rigid and flexed as his love seeds got implanted deep inside her body both heartbeats loud enough to be heard over miles. They lay entangled like this for eternity when Shanty slowly moved his face up and kissed Shweta’s forehead, she slowly opened her eyes as smile spread across both their face.

The memories were vivid even after so many days in Shanty’s mind, he felt hollowness in his heart and lump raising in his throat. He covered his eyes with his palm as if that could end this daily routine of travelling the past memories. It dint help, it never did; days flew by and the dreaded day made its appearance, Shanty and Shweta were in his car when the truck hit them hard, the truck was out of control as it hit them from the right where Shweta had been sitting. Shweta’s deafening shriek as he saw her head hit the glass as red glass splattered, his head hit the steering and even in that pain and panic he knew his world had come to an end.

Even after so many years Shanty felt it was just yesterday, his cheek hot and wet with tears, the accident had not only taken Shweta out of Shanty’s life but also his will to live. He didn’t die as he had promised Shweta once that he would never kill himself. Shanty had never been able to get close enough to anyone after Shweta ‘cause whenever he went closer to anyone Shweta’s shrieks and blood stained face haunted him. He felt he was cheating her and felt repulsive towards his partner.

He turned as his eyes fell on the boy who had returned him his libido after so many years. Strange enough he didn’t feel repulsive when he stroked his hair. He studied the boy, whose face was now blank and eyes wide open. He looked innocent but his eyes did not hide the agony inside him. Shanty felt an urge to protect this boy from this world; he swore he would do his best. Shanty stroked his forehead hinting the boy to sleep as he felt his own eyelids drooping.

It wasn’t long when Shanty got up startled, the boy was sitting near him, he was naked again and agitated from his rapid breathing, he looked down at Shanty. Despite being doctor he felt scared for a second with his demeanour but as soon as his gaze met the boys his heart melted, the boy was speaking some incoherent words Shanty picked out only a few words like ‘I am not slut’ ‘no don’t do that’ ‘stop please’ the boy changed from attacker to victim and was now pleading for help to save him from threat. Shanty swiftly got up and placed his arm on boy’s shoulder. Boy hugged him quickly urging him to save sobbing and hugging him Shanty held him close and stroked his head assuring him that he is safe and now with him. The sobs stopped after a while but the boy still hugged shanty.

Shanty, knew this was good the boy now in his blankness connected with him, he was now part of his world. Shanty slowly put the boy back on bed, but the boy never let Shanty off completely now he snuggled in his chest as they slept on bed. Shanty allowed him to snuggle closer and kissed his forehead and stroked his hair. Slowly soft snores filled the room, Shanty slowly tried to wriggle out but boy only got himself more entangled to him like a creeper on tree. Shanty mused and closed his eyes.

Sun peeping through the window, woke Shanty up next morning. Boy was still sleeping, Shanty as quietly as possible sneaked out of his own bed. He peeped out for the first time after so many years he smiled at the rising sun, and started his day. He had changed and was briefing his intern and nurse regarding the boy’s case in a corner of his room when boy woke up in a jiff as if out of nightmare. Shanty rushed to the bed, the intern and nurse flanked around. Boy was scared he was not looking around he just curled himself into ball, pleading - for apology and asking to be not thrown out. Shanty reached up to him, placed his hand reassuringly on his shoulder the boy was quick to hug him.

“Please don’t send me away” He urged and tightening his grip around Shanty “Please let me stay here with you, doc” He was speaking to Shanty. Shanty was shocked, did he hear him talk to nurse about moving him to the ward. He couldn’t possibly. “Don’t worry I am just shifting you to ward outside this room” Shanty slowly straightened his hair. The boy was still clutching him hard “I don’t want to go anywhere, please let me stay here, they’ll hit me again please doc” their gaze met and Shanty was moved with the pain and mistrust in his eyes for the world. Shanty turned to the intern, “Well let’s arrange a bed in my room and I’ll be attending him personally” Intern and nurse if shocked were good at not showing it. Shanty now turned back to the boy, put him down on bed again and adjusted sheets around him.
Last night Shanty had hit the chord and made himself part of boy’s world now he had a task of bringing him back to the world. Shanty got mentally busy trying to figure out how?

Late afternoon, Shanty got the much anticipated visit from his local inspector regarding the boy. Cops had managed to get information on whereabouts of the boy. He was from an affluent family in the main city his name was Siddhartha commonly known as Sid. Two weeks back the boy was kidnapped by the goons while he was returning from a friend’s house. The goons not only repeatedly raped him for atleast 12 days while he was in custody but also filmed the act to blackmail his parents for ransom. The goons now though under arrest the story of boy’s fate has reached every house in the city through the video thanks to the much abused technology. Police though have stopped circulation now they have no access to some private copies.

After this incident his parents alienated themselves with the boy and severed all the ties with him calling him faggot and no son of theirs. Since then, the boy was missing till last night when he was delivered at Shanty’s Sanatorium. Parents don’t want anything to do with the boy, Police can’t keep him with them as his case is closed with goons under arrest and the boy was over the age so once he was good to go he was on his own – Shanty quickly realised. He felt the familiar protective self pouncing; it had been years since he had nurtured this kind of protective feeling for anyone.

Shanty, thanked the police officer, and turned towards his room where Sid had spent most of the day sleeping. When he entered his room Sid was staring point blank towards his window. Shanty bolted his room and sat next to him “Sid” he reached the boy’s arm. Sid jumped in his place and looked back at Shanty, with terrified eyes. Shanty slowly stroked his cheek, then his forehead and reached for his hair as Sid’s expression mellowed and he let himself in Shanty’s embrace letting all pain, anger, betrayal and loneliness wash through tears spilling them on Shanty’s shirt as he slowly stroked his hair.

Sid continued to cry his heart out for next one hour while they sat there quietly. Sid’s sobs were now mellowing. Shanty, slowly collected his face in his palms and kissed him his forehead. Sid closed his eyes, I would never let him alone now, Shanty thought. Sid opened his eyes and opened his lips to say Shanty reading his mind shushed him “I know everything, and I am with you. Always” Shanty now again tightened his embrace around him as Sid snuggled closer to his chest, wet with his pain.

They were like this for half an hour when Shanty heard Sid softly snoring. Shanty knew this sleep was healing the wounds on Sid’s heart as much as his love, he carefully put him on the bed tugged sheets around him and walked out of his room for his night round. He instructed the staff on night duty and returned back to his room after an hour. Sid was still sleeping, Shanty peeled off his cloths dumped them in a laundry basket and entered hot shower; he felt hot water sooth his muscles. After a long blissful shower Shanty stepped out and changed in his night cloths. He saw two dinner plates on his table.

He bolted the door, and walked towards sleeping Sid. His innocence was mesmerising, the perfectly carved brows, sharp nose, pink luscious lips, and square jaw. Shanty slowly stroked Sid’s jet black hair. Sid’s eyes opened in a flash and met Shanty’s gaze. Shanty smiled, Sid relaxed “I thought you left me too” Sid mumbled looking at Shanty. Shanty moved himself a little closer “I would never leave you, promise” Shanty assured him. Sid looked back in Shanty’s eyes satisfied he snuggled closer to Shanty. “Aren’t you hungry?” Shanty chuckled though he was already feeling full with Sid so close to him but he knew Sid needed this food for recovery

Sid woke up and held Shanty’s hand “What about when I recover, will you leave me?” Sid persisted, “I said never” Shanty chuckled just to relax Sid a bit “I would never ever leave you” he again reassured. Sid was still not satisfied “But my parents left me, why won’t you?” Sid added as Shanty heard pain in his question. “I won’t leave you ‘cause. Ahem I Love You” Shanty spoke his heart out to Sid and himself for the first time since he had realised it. Sid again searched Shanty’s eyes like he was searching for Shanty’s commitment to what he had just said and nodded. Shanty knew it was difficult for boy to trust anyone with the pain of rejection from his own parents. Shanty ruffled his hair and said “Sid, let’s eat” Sid nodded again.

After food Shanty gave Sid tablets for supplementary nutrients and energy. Sid throughout the meal even now sat next to Shanty without losing contact off him once, otherwise they were was quiet. Shanty turned to make small talk, “Sid, you need a shower?” he didn’t know why he said that “Yes, but...” Sid was quiet. “Yes, but?” Shanty encouraged him “Will you... go away?” Shanty guessed his confusion. “I’ll be right here I’ll wait for you” Shanty added a warm smile just to make his assurance more convincing. “Can you... Can’t you come in?” Sid looked expectantly. “Yes I can. Sure” Shanty didn’t mind, last night’s lust had lost itself in the selfless love that emanated from Shanty now; all he cared was to protect and make Sid feel strong again, also he needed to examine Sid to check if his bruises were healing any faster.
Shanty ushered Sid in bathroom, last night’s memory haunted Shanty, unnerved Sid in no senses, he shuddered, decided that he will love and stand by Sid always or atleast till Sid wanted him to be. Sid had now peeled off his cloths and was in the shower though he never let Shanty off his sight even once. Shanty was also satisfied with himself that he had managed so much of improvement in Sid in just one day. Looking at this progress Shanty was sure Sid would be ready to face world sooner. Satisfaction spread in form of smile on his face as Sid walked out of shower, looking fresh and untouched like dew drop.

Shanty, finally tucked Sid in his bed kissed him on his forehead and got up to make a move towards his bed when Sid caught his hand “Will you sleep here?” Shanty smiled and got down next to Sid holding him as Sid snuggled closer resting himself on Shanty’s broad shoulder and tucking his face in his chest. Shanty tightened his embrace for the first time in years Shanty forgot his stroll with ghosts of past; soon the room was filled with soft snores as two tormented hearts found solace in each other’s arm.

Days passed by and Sid recovered faster to everyone’s amazement but his continued stay in Shanty’s room rose many grapevines. Moral police leaders and local charities conspired against the so-called unnatural union and today landed in Shanty’s small office room. “Doctor Sahib, Siddhartha has now recovered and it is unjust to let you bear the entire burden” They were coating the bitter tablet with their sweet words of concern for both Shanty and Sid. Shanty wasn’t oblivious to the fact. “We would like to take Siddhartha beta to our ashram; he can study further or work in ashram” Sid was in next room and could hear the conversation clearly. Shanty cleared his throat “I am grateful you thought about my inconvenience and I know you will take good care of him, sir” he tried to keep sarcasm out of his voice “But, I am sad Siddhartha needs to be under observation for few more days. I’ll get in touch with you once he is ready to leave the sanatorium” Shanty concluded. Loud whispers filled the room “Sahib, this is a village we can’t allow such city lifestyle in our place, it will have bad influence on our children” one of the moral police came out more blatantly. “Yes we can’t allow such blasphemy in our town” people echoed his words but more agitatedly. Shanty unnerved “I don’t understand your rage, anyways as I said once I am sure my patient is fit and fine I’ll myself call you”. There were more arguments but Shanty maintained his calm and rather than arguing told them that as a doctor he wasn’t still convinced of Sid’s progress and would allow him to leave only when he is assured.

Seeing the defiant doctor, crowd got a bit agitated but the leaders cooed the rage and menacingly told Shanty that they would come after a week when they would not listen to Shanty and take Sid with them. Shanty ushered them out of sanatorium. Shanty tired with this rant told his newly joined assistant doctor to take over the night round and making a few calls from his office retired to his room calling it off for the day.

As soon as Shanty bolted the door Sid ran and hugged him, Shanty embraced him back kissing his head. “I have to go, isn’t it?” Sid finally mumbled. Shanty brought his face to his and planted a small kiss on Sid’s forehead “No, I won’t let that happen, remember I promised” Sid looked in his eyes but found no frown or worry. “Before they come here again, we’ll set this place on its own and we’ll be away from all, just that...” it was now Shanty’s turn to search for trust in Sid’s eyes. Sid as if reading his thoughts said “I’ll follow you anywhere you take me, I want nothing but you” satisfied Shanty traced his fingers on Sid’s cheek and jaw line Sid kissed Shanty’s fingers brushing his lips Shanty chuckled “We are going away from these people, you and me. I have something to show you”. Shanty picked Sid in his arms and moved across the room to his study table, placed him on the chair and swiftly pulled out two envelope’s and placed first one in Sid’s hand.

Two tickets to Canada and their passports slipped out of the envelope lighting up Sid’s face. Shanty quickly pulled out a letter from another envelope and placed it in front of Sid, it was acceptance letter for Siddhartha from University of British Columbia. Siddhartha always dreamt to study in this University but the unexpected twists in his life had left him too traumatised to think of it but Shanty had brought his dream to reality. Sid jumped up the chair and hugged Shanty tight his joy knew no bounds he was going to be with Shanty and attending college at his favourite place he was ecstatic. Shanty was happy looking at Sid’s happiness; he had accepted the job offer from Vancouver General Hospital he felt warm at heart. Sid was happy and jumping like a kid, he hugged and kissed Shanty again and again. His biggest fear had been taken away; he knew whatever happens he will be with Shanty. Shanty felt proud at his work, looking at Sid, happy for the first time since he entered the sanatorium and his life!

Soon after Sid had calmed down a bit Shanty told him that they’ll be leaving Roha tomorrow late evening and they won’t pack many things to avoid unwanted attention to their departure. Sid was happy and all other details didn’t matter much as he was going to be with Shanty. Shanty once again went through his check list to see if all the things were taken care off. His staff already knew he was leaving with Sid tomorrow evening and all seem quite happy for both.

Soon they called it a day, and retired to their bed. It was then that Shanty reached for his pocket and brought out a small red box and placed it on his palm. Sid eyed him with curiosity of a child as Shanty bent on his knees in front of Sid “Siddhartha, now that we are leaving this country to be in a place where love is not judged by sex, caste or creed. I would like to ask you, I Shantanu want to spend each day of my life holding, loving and cherishing you until we live. Will you like to spend rest of your life with me?” Sid’s mouth fell open and eyes turned moist and water flowed down with every word that left Shanty. The lump in his throat was too much for him to speak so he simply nodded a big yes. Shanty got up and opened the box with two platinum bands. He smiled and slipped the band with Shantanu embossed in Sid’s finger and handed the band with Siddhartha embossed in his hand. Sid slipped the band with a big smile in Shanty’s finger and their lips met for a real kiss, first time.

Their lips found each other and their tongues were wrestling as their hands found erogenous zones on each other’s neck and back. They ran out of breath and separated only to catch breath twice as they kept on kissing each other fervently for what seemed like eternity. When they stopped their heart beats were so loud it felt their hearts would pop out of chest. Sid and Shanty smiled at each other, as Shanty made way to Sid’s ear lobes, munching slowly on the soft ear lobe he whispered, “Sid, I love you – and I promise as I said I would spend each day of my life loving and making love to you” Sid bit Shanty’s Shoulder as the ecstasy of his words and munching on ear lobe got too much too handle together. “I love you too doc, I love you a lot thanks for teaching me to live and love again” Sid whispered, Shanty again sealed Sid’s lip with his but this time the kiss was slow they traced contours of each other’s mouth there was more love and passion than force this time.

Their cloths evaporated in heat of this kiss and their bare skin glistened with sweat beads as Sid fit himself smugly in Shanty’s strong muscular body. They looked like two marble sculpts entangled making love with each other in dimly lit room. Wind caressed their body as they enjoyed exploring each other’s mouth and body. After an eternity their kiss broke as they both tried to suck in some fresh air. Sid smiled at Shanty as he caressed his face in his palms. Sid slowly slid down and started nibbling on Shanty’s neck, tracing his way down to his chest, abdomen to reach his navel and finally reached his throbbing love stick, a fresh drop of precum was glistening there. He reached for the drop with his tongue, Shanty hissed and pulled him up to his face “Sid don’t” he hissed “Doc I want to be one with you, please” Sid pleaded.
Shanty closed his eyes and tear escaped his left eye, Sid put his lips on the drop, and then planted small wet kisses on Shanty’s closed eye lids. Shanty’s mind now whirlwind of emotions, Sid determined, again slipped down and in one quick moment engulfed the warm hardness to its length as Shanty squirmed under this assault. Slowly Sid started bobbing up and down as he relished the warm, silky yet iron hard feel with his soft luscious pink tongue and lips. Shanty smiled and now adjusted himself between thighs of Sid and reached with his tongue to his rosebud. Sid moaned with mouth full as Shanty slowly opened the pink puckered bud.

Shanty’s tongue moistened and reached the cores as Sid could no longer control his urge to feel Shanty inside. Shanty sensing Sid, arranged himself behind Sid and placed his now throbbing member on Sid’s expecting hole. He kissed Sid’s earlobe “Ready” Sid nodded with his eyes closed he wanted to wipe out all the painful past memories with Shanty – the man that loved him and the man he loved.

Shanty slowly pushed himself inside as Sid adjusted himself, Sid felt complete but the anticipation and anxiety had his heart beating in mouth Shanty, pressed his lips on Sid as they were engulfed physically in love. Slowly, Shanty started rhythmic to and fro movements while softly playing with Sid’s love flute, Sid felt he was in heaven. They kept going on for long time as Shanty picked up pace both on his pelvic moment and playful teasing on Sid’s flute. In a long howl they both arched and hunched releasing their love juices. Shanty, deep inside Sid and Sid, on Shanty’s palm; Shanty looked at his palm and wished the love juices found his insides too, but he smiled as he knew soon it would.

As there breathing was a bit under control Sid reclaimed his place by snuggling close to Shanty and tucking his face in his chest. Shanty affectionately patted his hair, and mused the ghosts of their pasts had been wooed away!