Sorry it took so long, I guess it never got posted.
*****

Tyler
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Sammy. What can I say I do love you, not the way you do me. I don"t know why... Why I can"t love you the same, believe me I"ve tried.

I stayed in bed the entire day, thinking, and questioning myself wether I should go to Samuel"s house. Should I apologize for what happenend? I"m still not clear on everything, I was wasted, and he knew it. I guess I"m just confused, about myself, and everything about me. It"s like I don"t know who I am anymore. It"s not Samuel who"s confusing me, atleadt I hope not. It could be that gay moment that everyone gets, but I doubt it, what I did was gay.

If I go to his house he may be mad at me, I hope not, I can"t live without him. If I go we"ll talk about what happenend, and I don"t want that, I would feel so uncomfortable. Knowing him he"ll want to talk, he won"t let me leave until we do. He"ll bring everything I said up, and I"ll most likely deny, all of his allegations. We"ll get into an arguement, say sorry, and try to get over it.

I got on myspace (yeah I"m a myspace whore). I look to see is sammys online, and thankfuly he wasn"t. I look at my photos and his, then relise, I should"ve known that he"s gay. Most of our photos were of us holding eachother, hugging, and holding hands, just for the fun of it. It was sorta expected of us to do so, being emo, most people do think all emos are gay or bi.

We were always together, inseperable you may say. He thought I was gay, and yet it never crossed my mind that he might be.

I don"t know what to do, I"ll just sleep on it. (haha that"s what HE said)

I"ll just send him a text.

*****

Samuel

I woke up monday morning, and immeadiately look at my phone. I have have about five texts, one from Tyler, and some from other people that aren"t important to me as of right now.

"we need to talk about last night"

I sent him a text. "ok, come to my house later"

I never got a response, so I assumed he got it.

I wanted to tell someone about last night, but I couldn"t risk being kicked out of town, or do that to Tyler. I hope he meant that he loves me, if he lied it would break my heart, and I wouldn"t be able to live anymore.

9:16pm

*knock knock knock* Tylers here, for some reason he only knocks three times. I open the door and see Tyler, dressed in in his white shirt and crimson skinny jeans, I just want to... Well do things to him.

"Samuel... About last night-"

"it was fun, I really liked it"

"are you sure I shouldn"t have said what I did"

"what... What do you mean?"

"I"m sorry, but I was blown, and wasted."

"what to you mean, shouldn"t have said what you did"

"I shouldn"t have called you a fag, cussed, or kicked you out of my house"
"I"m sorry sammy, I still want to be friends though, to you?"

"yeah I do"

"see you at school tommorrow."

What... Wait... What the hell. No there"s no way, it"s not possible. I look at my phone;
Sunday, 4, 9:30pm.

No I coudnt have... I didn"t. It seemed so real, it felt so real. There"s no way I dreamt me and Tyler fucking. It"s not possible.

Once again, my heart felt as if it were burried.

*****
So I hope you enjoi"d this part. I myself. found it quite saddening. I wrote it while listening to Beethoven"s depressing music (but none the less, truly amazing)



I sat on my couch, trying to comprehend what just happened.